doesn't mean anything- Alicia Keys

Used to dream of being a millionaire. without a care

but if i'm seeing my dreams and you aren't there

'cause it's over

that just wont be fair

darling,

rather be a poor women living on the street,

no food to eat,

cause i don't want no pie if i have to cry.

cause it's over

when you said goodbye!

all at once...

i had it all

but

it doenst mean anything

now that you're gone

from above seems i had it all

but it doesnt mean anything

since you're gone

now i see myself through different eyes,

it's no surprise!

being alone will make you realize

when it's over !

all in love is fair i shoulda been there, i shoulda been there, i shoulda shoulda

all at once..

i had it all

but

it doesnt mean anything

now that you're gone

from above seem i had it all

but it doesn't mean anything

since you're gone

i know i pushed you away

what can i do that would save our love

take these material things

they don't mean nothing

its you that i want

all at once....

i had it all

but it doesnt mean anything

now that you're gone

from above,

seems i had it all

but it doesnt mean anything

since you're gone

all at once...

i had it all

but it doesnt mean anything

now that you're gone

from above,

seems i had it all

but it doesn't mean anything

since you're gone

a letter to A

have been feeling down for the whole two weeks already.. yup, it's because of the issue that we are facing now.. i knew the reaction from your mom since the beginning. that's why i have been stopping u telling ur mom about us.. we are not from the same country.. and it's far away.. i have never feel the distance between us before. but now i do.. it's not because i don't have the fire red love anymore.. it' because of what you are doing now.. i know that you want to avoid your family from finding who you are with.. calling me to delete you from my facebook and deleting what you wrote about me on your blog and your mom threathening you that she'll cut off your mobile line if she found out that we contact each other on the phone.. it's pain enough for me.. and we have not been in contact frequently like last time.. this is suffering... really.. i rather face with your family like a man... but, i can't stop from whatever you doing.. it's your decision.. you want me to stop being so paranoid.. but it's really hard... i don't wanna lose you... you said that you don't own me.. but deep in my heart, you already own me.. i can dedicate my whole life to you..
for these past two weeks i coudn't do anything right.. my best friend in college do know that i'm facing this issue.. he do tried to make me feel better.. but i keep on pulling my face for the whole time.. sometimes faking some smile... and i think now he's tired of it.. my homeworks and assignments are pilling up... and dad wants me to go home today.. my family is moving to another house tommorow. i know i should be going back.. but i still awaiting for the chance to talk to you again.. i hope that you are not avoiding me now... if you do, i'll be the most miserable man... wish everything will go back to normal soon...i'm missing you like i have never before...

@.@

have not being updating my post for a while.. this post is to prove that i am still a blogger! LOL..

assignments are pilling up now.. and i still keep on facebook-ing.. the apps keep pulling me to it.. and i have been deep into someone too.. you know who you are.. not gonna mention your name here. hehe...

hmm.. i have a new goal recently. i have to quit smoking now. i don't know how i am gonna make it but i hope i can.. wish i have that motivation.. i know... i would think of piggy! haha..

alrite.. gonna make this post short and brief.. TAta!

back to my old ranch...lol

i'm back to my hometown now. it's d semester break again. my holiday started with some unpleasant incidents. i had to work at my cousin's shop. it's a prawn fishing center. the indonesian women he hired before was fired. so, i was the only one to work there. gosh, no one know how much phobia that i get.. i'm scared of prawns! i mean the living one.. and even the dead one.. it's slimmy skin...and d smell of it.. eww... but yesterday was the last day i worked for him. so glad that i had stop.. it's been a boring day staying at home. there's no internet at my home.. sucks.. so i look for some friends.. and we ended up with no where to go.. i explored the whole seremban already.. literally.. luckily there's restourants that provide free WIFI service here. i can spend hours there.. i'm missing my piggy so much.. aww... cant wait to c u again, piggy...

teaser

sorry for not blogging so often..

it's exam again.. my last paper is on Monday..

it's been a great week.. probably the best week of my life..

no mood for merdeka.... gonna wear black tomoro... i'm sad for this country...

Malaysia... what colour are u?

It's August again.. the month where malaysian celebrates their triumph over colonization.
as my age are slowly coming closer to 20, i bare in mind that the only gift that left for me as a Malaysian from the last generation is the right to vote in the general election..

days by days, bad news heard from the mainstream and independent medias..
government wrong doings... corruptions... cronizations...
what they've done?
me as a part of the y-generation are easily biased..
what we see
what we heard
is what we believe..

when Malaysian wanted a new hope for them, the BN punish us for being ambitious..
try recall back the incidents that happened in just 1 year
first the hindraf..
then, RPK and the bloggers..
then, Perak crisis..
then, somebody got their naked picture circulated(selangor)..
then, somebody got detained for voicing out their disatisfactions..
then, MANY BODIES din't survive the detentions..
then, they shut the student's mouth by black mailing the students..

I wanted a good future for myself..
if i vote for BN, what do i get?

• easy business ? (bos, mau gi minum teh? i belanja) and become a big fat "businessmen"?
• my future tax money will be used as part of the fund for somebody's big big bungalow?
• move to malay populated township? (there's where all the taxpayer's money flowed to)
• put my children in Sekolah Kebangsaan? (easy to pass SPM, no need take chinese.. they set a low margin to help those NON-NON-bumiputra,got it? )
• a PM with a name that closest to the word "najis"

etc...

what if i vote for the opposition?

• i maybe one of the ppl that visit ISA (i'm writting this post anyway)
• i got block from entering the local universities
• more more ppl die ( u know why)
• not enough fund to repair a poth hole on the road..
• etc....

but things could be different if the opposition outnumbered...

i love this coutry.. not because of the government.. the government din't do anything for us.. even a PR in AUS could easily get a free medical service...in here, we're like shit for them to take out their time to take care of. I LOVE this country because of the PEOPLE.. and food (lol)..

Friends, voice it out loud the voice within u! We are not dummies! Negaraku, tanah air milik kita.. Rahmat bahagia, Tuhan-Ku kurniakan keadilan kita..

p/s: pls don't racist anymore ,guys...

morning...

it's 7.50am now.. me n clarence reach coll around 7.25am today..
later it's our turn to present for d advertising assignment... 4 other members havent turn up yet..
today's class going to start at 8.00am...
wonder how i going to do later in the presentation..

o.0

aiyo.... i very soh zai leh.. nobody forget me actually... hahaha...
all my frens still stay d same.. maybe i think too much liao.. wakaka..
laz saturday we went to Melaka for a trip. hmm.. quite enjoy.. i will post some pic later...
hmm... friends forever!

is me again..

it's been a long time since d last time i update my blog..
there's reasons for me to stop for a while. i have been thinking for some time about this life.
why all the stuffs that happened will happen again? is there any way to stop the cycle?
i hate this cycle...the friendship cycle...
the friend that had been a best friend of mine had turned my old best friend.. it happens to me once in a few years... why do i have to face this? i hate it when my best friend no longer wants to talk to me.. i hate it d most if someone try to cut contact with me... what kind of great evil things that i had done to make them go away?? i din't do anything at all... i'm really really really sad when i'm losing a friend... and for no reason! damn this life!!

on the other side, my new life in college are getting much more brighter than before.. new friends keep coming. everyone loves to talk..play...and share the same interest too... the bond between the students in my group are getting stronger day by day... and this time i break the habbit.. i somehow manage to stop going back to seremban on weekends. i think my new life really belongs to here... i got group mates staying in the same condo.. this never happen when i was in banking and finance.. perhaps, it's fate...

hehe..

clarence lost on some bet and i accompany him going to d atm machine.

while i was waiting for him, i notice this;

take a closer look...

haha... got it? naughty me...

happy go lucky?

Feel so free now. Just wanna say something here..
It's my first week driving to college.. so far so good..
Everytime i hear my friends having some problems whatever that they are doing makes me feel that i'm lucky enough.. I don't meant that i don't have any problem at all. But maybe it depends on oneselves personality. I don't feel terrible when i was having a problem.. Maybe i do learnt something from my past experiences. All the problems will be solved.. It's just a matter of time..

just back from wangsa jusco
bought some small items.. but can cost me till rm7+.++
clarence n cj really naughty.. make me buy beer....dat's y can b so expensive.....
dunno tomorrow got enuf money for pasar malam o not...
God of fortune, pls help ME!!!

it's not a bad day for me. Thinking how i'm gonna start my assignments first.. and which to start??

some of my dream items

Omg.. i'm so in love with adidas..

check this out

adidas porsche design bagpack

porsche design watch..

love it..

Zack is in Away mode

There's something happenned in my life for the past few weeks. Something twisted my life. I don't use the word 'interferrence' to refer those changes. It's kind of akward for me...

I got a new group of friends in college now. We are still new and they could'nt compare to my bunch of brothers in seremban. I do feel some difference in myself.. No, i haven't change yet.. I think it is just because that i'm trying to make some adjustment to fit in.. I just didn't hang out with my brothers at Seremban for 1 weekend and damn, Alex started wondering and questioned me.. Duh, i just wanna rest myself.. I won't stop hanging with you all. I love to hang out with you all.. I have been trying very hard to make myself live happily...

Back to streets..

Wow, it's been a long time since the last time i hang out around bukit bintang. I'm so tired man...
here's a highlights of d day,

• i finally found the kind of bag that i wanted and i grab it without hesitating.. It's a bag from Adidas in Pavillion..i wont tell the price here..haha

• We (my new classmates and a friend from Seremban) had our lunch at Carl's Jr. It is so worth it! We get an ample amounts of fries that we cant manage to finish, refill any type of drinks that we want, and a 'king size' burger just for rm2+.++.( and we have never feel that full before)

• None of us that came back home empty handed. (but we ALMOST manage to empty our wallet).. lolz

Well, that's a simple wrap up of the day..

oh, ms.June!

1st tutorial starts today.
and i overslept the 1st tutorial for today..
make some new friends.. and feel kind of relieve to be in this group..

recycle...

So sorry guys for not updating my blog. I have been away for the whole month..
My issues are all over now. I'm in advertising now. Gotta bid farewell to banking and finance.
I know it's not easy to start all over again. I'm gonna put more of myself into what i'm studying now. Kambateh!!

hmm

2 weeks more.. and everything will come to an end....
it's not the end of the world for me..
i'll try my best to talk to my dad..
It's just two ways left for me.
1, register another course
2, go to work
i think these two will be my only options left for me...

Life's tougher, huh?

There's something keep playing on my mind again and again since last week..
I'm trying to figure out a solution for my problem..
And it's hard..
I knew i wasn't suitable for the subject that i'm taking now.
And i wanted to change course..
i spoke to my dad about this on Saturday..
and he wanted me to continue on..
But, my heart wasn't there to keep on studying..
I forced myself everyday.. but, it doesn't work..
I'm quite reluctant to quit now actually.
I new found friendships will just gone if i quit..
Yah, i'm "kiasu"..
So what? Everyone is so 'kiasu' in this world..
Sigh..

My bad..

i'm back.. it's Thursday..
I chat with a girl that i less chat with recently.
I guess it's the first time we talk for more than 3 minutes.
She was dull..
Her bf just broke up with her..
She was quite dissappointed with that guy actually...
he left her with lame excusses..
the girl admits that the boy get bored with her already.
they have been together for more than 1 year...
and it just ended this way..
Who's faults is it to let it end this way?
hmm..

On the second thought,
their situations reminds me of my secondary school days..
I was like the boy..
try to find any excuse to dump a girl if i get bored..
if any of my friends say something like 'your chick looks fat' or something like that, i definitely would dump her..
Irressponssible!!
that was the word..
Oh my god.. i've been such a bad boy in school..
i think every guy share the same experience...
Most of the guys would try to hide themself
or turn their back when there's problems...
and quite less of boys would face the problem..
But sometimes i faced some of my problems..
after some motivation that inspire me to do so..
Those old school days were over..

心痛

Lyricist[作詞]：方炯鑌Composer[作曲]：方炯鑌Producer[製作人]：陳冠甫Arranger[編曲]：沙維琪
我知道妳要走
妳卻一直沒說出口
只是變得越來越冷漠
後來我才懂
分手的話妳說不出口
我就忍著痛給妳最後的溫柔

分手
我們就分手
就讓我說出妳要的
妳點點頭
就沉默連再見妳都略過

心痛
怎麼會心痛
我以為心痛只是種形容
這一刻我才懂那一種痛
是真的痛

想說聲抱歉
讓妳等了那麼久
還以為有機會能將妳挽留
因為我的心還是深深的愛著妳
沒想到妳對我的愛已到盡頭

分手
我們就分手
就讓我說出妳要的
妳點點頭
就沉默連再見妳都略過

心痛
怎麼會心痛
我以為心痛只是種形容
這一刻我才懂那一種痛
是真的痛

Remember yesterday?..

time pass so swiftly.

there's too much of regretions in our life...

should i still wondering the motives of my life?

is there nothing could be done to change the wrong?

i'm such an idiot for defending all the wrong decisions that i have made.

There's nobody could change it for me. It's up to my next move. There's to much uncertainty in this life. Can i just sit here and wait? or just continue on? or act bravely to change it all. Maybe i should. I can just forget about all the stupid mistakes and continue on with the second path. I'm too selfish to make any resposibilities. All i want is the feeling of hugging the green grass field in the garden and look at the blue sky. All the problems would just fade away from my mind. All i can do now is just take a big breathe.

Hoosh!!!! Monday!!

Oh,Monday!!!
yup,it's Monday..i guess most of the people share the same dillemma on monday...
monday means the end of all the crazy parties and gotta back to work..
and me? got to back to college..
i have to get up at 5a.m on my every usual monday and get prepared before getting ready to go back to K.L...
i going back to K.L that early just to avoid getting trapped in the traffic..
Today K late picking me up and we have to face the crazy traffic this morning.. and his gf was deep asleep...
when reach my hostel, i gotta wash all the clothes i wore last week..
there's a washing machine here.. so, dont' think that i'm so hardworking..
after finishing all the chores, i went to college at 10..
i'm suppose to meet Melvin and Beh at library.. it's for the assignment..
but Beh got the wrong time and though we suppose to meet at 12.. gosh..
it was just me and melvin...
the deadline is this week.. and we havent even started a stroke of it..
are we going to make it??? í dunno..
all i want to do now is just sleep...
i'm so tired.. argh..

i won't fake myself..

it's been an emotional roller coaster ride this week in college.. everyone seems like treating me differently. Sometimes they ignored my existence.. What's going on?
did i say or did something that upset them?
this week maybe is my quitest days in college..
i'm not here to complain.. i wont just write this purposely to attract attention...
I'm here to ESPRESS my feelings..
i am who i am... i wont change myself purposely to please somebody..
i don't need alots of friends... a TRUE friend is worth million times more than those fakers outside there.. i don't mean to offence anyone.
I'm just tired of feeling dissapointed.

Amnesty criticises Malaysian arrests for insulting sultan

Amnesty International on Wednesday condemned Malaysia's move to charge eight people for insulting a sultan on the Internet, saying it was a serious blow to freedom of expression.
Six people were charged last week over comments posted on a royal website, under laws banning the transmission of vulgar or threatening comments. Another two were brought to court in northeastern Terengganu state on Monday.
One of the eight has already pleaded guilty and has been fined 10,000 ringgit (2,699 dollars) in the first conviction of its kind in the country, while the others face trial after pleading not guilty and up to one year in jail.
Amnesty urged the Malaysian government to drop all the charges, saying the move was a "very troubling step backward."
"This development is a serious blow to freedom of expression in Malaysia and has set a very dangerous precedent for people wishing to express their views on the Internet," Sam Zarifi, Amnesty's Asia-Pacific director, said in a statement.
"The Internet was one of the few venues available for Malaysians to express their views relatively freely, and now it looks like the government will extend its restrictions on free press to the web," he added.
The comments were posted during a political crisis that broke out in January in northern Perak state, pitting the Pakatak Rakyat opposition alliance against the Barisan Nasional coalition which rules nationally.
In a controversial move, Sultan Azlan Shah ordered the Pakatan Rakyat state government to quit after defections upset the delicate balance of power in the state, which changed hands in general elections a year ago.
Malaysia's government has expressed frustration over its inability to rein in blogs and Internet portals, which have become popular alternative news sources in a country where the mainstream media is tightly controlled.
Since last year, the government has taken action against several online figures, including arresting the nation's most popular blogger Raja Petra Kamaruddin under a tough security law which allows for detention without trial.

sing along song

I wrote this song It's not too long

Cause I'm thinking about you

I wrote this song

Maybe I'm wrong to be called all about you

I don't know what you think about me Maybe you think nothing at all

But,maybe you could just lie to me

We could be in love, you see

Let's sing a long song that not too long

It's when I think about you then

I hear song and you can sing alone

Maybe if you won't want to

Cause baby i wrote,i wrote this for you

I wrote this song It's not too long cause

I'm the one who loves you

i wrote this song this can't be wrong

I don't wanna smile without you

I just want to make you happy

Maybe you want nothing at all

How I wish that you are mean to be forever and the day with me

It's a sing a long song that not too long

It's when I think about you then I hear song and you can sing along

Maybe if you don't want to

Cause baby i wrote,i wrote this for you

In every way, you mean more to me

then you love more

Girl, I do my best to show these words are true

And if you like to make a song in the perfect harmony with me

I find the greatest words to sing

so we could write our own romantic thing

self-talk...

it's the 3rd day of my 3rd semester.. everything seems normal.
I have been fussy about something since last week. But now i got the answer for it..
Thanks to my cousin. (thanks,bro!)
Looks like a new life have begin for me.
From now on i won't be worrying about anything else. Once i did my decision, i won't change my mind easily anymore.
hmm.. this is a dialogue to myself. i know you guys won't be understanding what i'm saying.
Nvm, i leave it this way...

why love??

can i live without love?

i think i can...or couldn't...

It's so frustrated when i look at other couples on the street, in the mall, or everywhere i go...

Humans really can't live without love, is it?

hmm..

I'm tried to find everywhere for ms.right.. but i don't know why till now that i'm living a single's life..

I thought of alot of things when i have a gf in the future.

i will give her a morning call everyday so she wont be late.

i will pick her up to everywhere she goes..

i will not leave her lonely...i will be her best friend..

i will love her in everywhere..

i will be her favourite teddy bear to be hugged..

i will be the frog for her to kiss so i will be her prince forever..

There's so much more things that i wanna do.

memory...

Million thanks to the gang.

It was my happiest birthday ever. Thanks for making my life filled with endless fun and joys.

frustrated..

Gosh!
i lost my password and the username for my old blog..
i just created in not more than 2 months.. sigh...
so, stop saying that i'm lazy to update my blog... i just lost all the keys entering it only...
haiz...